Transition:

Take Advantage of the Springboard of Life Changes!

• Transition is the term used by psychologists to talk about how we experience change.
• Most people don't know they are "in Transition"
until they near the end of the process.
• Yet, understanding it can make the experience a lot easier!

It is Certainly a Process:

• When people tell stories of big changes in their lives, good or bad,

they look back and see a process.
• It lasts from a few hours to many weeks, depending on:
• how big the change is,
• how many changes have they experienced before this one,
• whether or not they could talk freely with someone about it.
• Not, whether it is good or bad (although, unexpected changes seem harder.)
• People feel a wide range of feelings, and looking back, they wondered if they are "losing it."
• Even happy changes like marriage, birth of children, can bring unpleasant emotions to surface.
• I hope you will know why this is, by the end of this page, and set your mind at ease!
• The process has some stages people talk about:
• Some say it is like the rapids in a river.

You seem to be floating along and around the next bend, it narrows!
The water is fast and churning. Then it levels out again.
• William Bridges talks about three stages:
• A time of Ending, when things are closing down, or finishing a cycle.
• A Fallow time, when nothing seems to be happening.
• Next, a time of new Beginning, feeling your way into a more or less unknown future.
• I like four stages, like four seasons:
• Autumn or Fall suggest Endings are natural, rather than tragic.
• Winter is a Fallow time, nature is hibernating, maybe the process becomes invisible.
• Spring, a time of Beginnings, and things unfold according to prevailing conditions.
• Summer, for me is a time of Working.
• This carries the idea that we are always in transitions of one sort or another!

Here's my Springboard Idea:
Number "1"  suggests the start of the change.  In terms of mood or morale,
we seem to get a lift here before a letdown.
When the change is about loss (say of a loved one) we feel numb, or "nothing."
This is when we can make arrangements without a flood of emotion.  Often, transitions like selling your house or getting a new job, can be similar to the grieving the loss of a loved one!

        *                                                                                                 YES!
    *     *                                                                                                I'm
1           *        Eventually, we "come down,"                                         Back!
              *            more or less                                                              *
                2    Here's when we might feel anger!                            *
                 *                                                                                   *
                  *                                                                               *
                    3 Here we may have second thoughts,              *
                      *    want to bargain or make deals,               *
                        *         to ease the discomfort.                 *
                         4   Here we might                               *
                            *    feel depressed                     *
                              *    getting "the blues"      *
                                *                                  *
Eventually,                  *                        * 
We come to Accept       *             *      6!
our changed situation:      5
This is the bottom of the spring board and the red * * *  indicate rebounding up!
Notice # 6! (to the right of 5)
This is a point in Transition, that is different than ordinary grief. 5)
It is a time of Self-doubt!
I believe that in transition something of the old self dies.
The change is calling for something different, than in the past!
We had a pretty good idea how good we were in the past.
But, we have little or no information on how we will do in the new situation!

Self-respect gives balance on the Board!

• I think the springboard is a good image of what happens in transition.
• As we drop down on the board, there is a compression of energy

and that will lift us out!
• Our self-respect will determine nicely we rebound!
• If we have a good opinion of yourselves, we can take the unknown future

with less hesitation.
• If we are hard on ourselves, if we are self-critical, we may not welcome

the newness, because without practice, we will make mistakes.
• At this point, a lesson from baseball:

All the great batters struck out more often than they hit a home run!